This post isn’t really about honey and clover.
In episode 16 in the first season of Honey and Clover (you can watch it here but its with mandarin subtitles), Yamada’s gang of childhood friends decide to propose to her simultaneously, which she runs away from without giving an answer. When Hanamoto-sensei asks why she is avoiding her friends. She cries, saying “do I have to tell them what hurt me to hear?” - that she will never see them as more than close friends no matter how hard they try or how long they wait - realizing that refusing to lower her expectations and accept her suitors, while still holding on for Mayama who sees her the same way, would be hypocritical. She finally realizes how Mayama feels, and cannot reasonable blame him for not changing his mind however dedicated she is to it. Hanamoto-sensei tells her that she should just be honest about how she feels, and let the guys decide between making an effort to change her mind (however futile it may be) or giving up - as that is the same choice she has with chasing Mayama. Later on, Hanamoto-sensei cryptically notes that there is a third option, which he doesn’t state, as if one believes that there are only those two options to chose from (fighting on or giving up), one can ‘open pathways’. That option, as Garten at Memento notes, is to long from afar, contenting oneself with friendship while always holding on for the possibility that it might become something more. By never letting go of a futile love, while never acting on it, we can never move on with our lives. That appears to be Hanamoto-sensei’s own choice with regard to Rika and later, Hagu.
